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When a new source of taxation is found it never means, in practice, that the old source is abandoned. It merely means that the politicians have two ways of milking the taxpayer where they had one before.
H. L. Mencken
For everything I do, I think about a 6-year-old girl and her mom that I saw at my concert last night. I think about what those two individuals would think if I were at a club last night. I never want to be arrested, and I never want to get a DUI, those are my moral values.
Taylor Swift
What is a wife and what is a harlot? What is a church and what is a theatre? are they two and not one? Can they exist separate? Are not religion and politics the same thing? Brotherhood is religion. O demonstrations of reason dividing families in cruelty and pride!
William Blake
I have no name: I am but two days old. What shall I call thee? I happy am, Joy is my name. Sweet joy befall thee!
William Blake
It is a damn poor mind indeed which can't think of at least two ways to spell any word.
Andrew Jackson
I have no use for bodyguards, but I have very specific use for two highly trained certified public accountants.
Elvis Presley
Me and Janet really are two different people.
Michael Jackson
My own ideals for the university are those of a genuine democracy and serious scholarship. These two, indeed, seem to go together.
Woodrow Wilson
Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other who never forgets them.
Ogden Nash
I made a game effort to argue but two things were against me: the umpires and the rules.
Leo Durocher
School divides life into two segments, which are increasingly of comparable length. As much as anything else, schooling implies custodial care for persons who are declared undesirable elsewhere by the simple fact that a school has been built to serve them.
Ivan Illich
There are two tragedies in life. One is to lose your heart's desire. The other is to gain it.
George Bernard Shaw
There are two kinds of stones, as everyone knows, one of which rolls.
Amelia Earhart
A Jewish woman had two chickens. One got sick, so the woman made chicken soup out of the other one to help the sick one get well.
Henny Youngman
Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays.
Henny Youngman
I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places.
Henny Youngman
While playing golf today I hit two good balls. I stepped on a rake.
Henny Youngman
Those two are a fastidious couple. She's fast and he's hideous.
Henny Youngman
Nothing is so great an example of bad manners as flattery. If you flatter all the company, you please none; If you flatter only one or two, you offend the rest.
Jonathan Swift
Life contains but two tragedies. One is not to get your heart's desire; the other is to get it.
George Bernard Shaw
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